Except for the occasional Saturday, I publish a blog post every single day, and I do so for more reasons than one. But mostly, I do it to because it’s my job and I love it and I enjoy staying connected to all of you and to this blogging internet world that so many of us “live” in.
On the rare occasion that I am somehow unable to post, like yesterday, I feel a certain amount of pressure and anxiety build up and find my mind obsessing on the fact that I am not doing my job.
Sure I am my own boss, and sure I can choose to show up for work or not, but most days, I show up – and when I can’t, I feel like a bad employee. It sounds funny, but it’s so true.
I don’t really take sick days or vacation days, even though I could {and probably should now and again} it’s just not part of my work ethic {at least now that I work for myself ;}. And I wonder if that categorizes me as too involved, obsessed, and possibly labeled as a workaholic? But if you love your work and what you do, do the same labels fit?
Yesterday morning I sat down at my desk {above} to get to work and my computer had had it. It was done. I could do nothing.
And at that realization, a surge of adrenaline and anxiety rushed over me. So I ran up stairs to the guest room where I keep my old iMac {since there’s no TV in that room, guests can watch DVDs on it} and hoped I could work from it. But the keyboard wasn’t working and I couldn’t find the other one.
My only choice was to accept defeat and adapt to the fact that I was going to HAVE TO just take the day off and try to get my computer fixed.
Gripping the wheel, I made it down the mountain and to the nearest Apple store, which is at Victoria Gardens in Rancho Cucamonga, and one of the prettiest shopping destinations I’ve been to in a while {because generally I just shop online}. It’s a cross between 3rd Street in Santa Monica and Vegas casino shops, and is HUGE. It was my first visit and a little too hot now that I’m used to the crisp mountain air, but on a breezy spring day, it would make for a nice afternoon with a friend.
The Apple store was beautiful and everyone was super nice and helpful and as I was waiting for a “genius” to help me out, an adorably sweet girl named Amy made me blush when she approached me to tell me she follows my blog {Thanks Amy ;}
But when all was said and done, {and no, my computer is still not repaired} but knowing that I couldn’t work no matter what, surprisingly took a little pressure off and by the end of the day I started thinking that maybe I should take the whole week off and spend it creating the list of DIYs and home improvements I’ve wanted to do but haven’t had the time, and have them all photographed and ready to edit for the coming weeks.
And then I thought, yeah right, Take the whole week off!?!? I couldn’t.
So I purchased a laptop, because I’ve been wanting to anyway so I can choose to work in another, more relaxed space and environment, if I’d like to, and found an old keyboard for my old computer, because it has programs like Photoshop that I need, and set up shop in the guest room upstairs.
I’m actually sitting at the kitchen counter typing this right now as the doggies play/fight with each other under my feet, and that’s nice… so maybe I’ll just slow it down a bit this week and meet somewhere in the middle of what my work ethic tells me I “should” be doing and what my body and mind actually want to do.
That’s a start, right?
