It’s true that we can all probably watch TedTalks and motivational videos and read personal growth and self-help books until we have that A-HA moment and IN that moment, feel as if we’re changed forever… WE GET LIFE and we’re thriving.
Then a few days later, we’ve forgotten all that we have learned and are walking around in our robotic state, just as we had been a few days prior, wondering where all of our inspiration has gone… and that’s because there is a HUGE difference between learning information and thus, knowing something – and actually taking action.
It’s easier to simply say I GET IT and go about our day than it is to actually PRACTICE the discipline and put in the effort it takes to really get to where we want to be, become who we want to be, or live the life we truly want to live. And that’s usually when our defenses rise and we give ourselves all the excuses as to why “THEY” are living the best life ever and “WE” are not. It must be luck or some external event or a “born rich” reason as to why THEY have it all figured out and WE do not.
In those instances we also often think “OH, I tried it, and it didn’t work for me”… but that’s not the actual truth and we know it. It’s far easier to sabotage ourselves with excuses, fall into old patterns, claiming it didn’t really work for “us” than it is to really put in the hard work. Because that’s what it is… WORK. And sometimes it’s not easy. But in the end, it’s only through the work, the effort, the discipline and the practice that we actually get what we want. And are also happy as a side effect.
An example that always smacks me right in the face is fitness: Let’s say I want to have 6-pack/washboard abs… and let’s say I did about 100 crunches one night and woke up the next morning only to find my soft and gooey center beneath my shirt and then got so discouraged I exclaimed CRUNCHES DON’T WORK FOR ME! You’d laugh in my face, wouldn’t you? Because you know that I’d have to do hundreds of sets of crunches and sit ups and side bends and even cardio workouts nearly every day to see any difference and get those washboard abs… and the same is true with anything else in life.
Overnight success just does not exist. Throw it out of your mind. It’s planning and consistent action that creates success in any area, whether business or personal or physical or mental, it’s all the same; it takes daily practice and consistency to get what you want. Period.
BUT when we see a plan laid out in front of us that visually displays the steps to take to get what we want, our assessment of the situation begins to change. We start to see the possibility of it becoming a reality and the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel appears bright and shiny.
In the TedTalk below, Psychologist Dr. Jennice Vilhauer says “When you don’t act on what you want, you take yourself out of the game without even giving yourself a chance.” Our expectations are keeping us stuck because we’re using the past to project the future and when we think about the future, the same part of the brain gets activated as when we think of the past.
But she says it’s not the ACTUAL PAST that is holding us back when we feel stuck, it’s that WE DON’T BELIEVE our future can be any different or get any better… and so obviously, it doesn’t.
W A T C H : Why you don’t get what you want; it’s not what you expect | Jennice Vilhauer | TEDxPeachtree
4 Steps to Make Your Goals More Attainable…
* Change your expectations to match with what you want so you can take consistent action in creating a life you love.
* Expect that your future will be better than your past, then envision what you want your future to look like, break down what it may take to get there, plan your steps to achieving your little goals to get you to your bigger goal.
* Use your conscious mind to override your auto-thinking and plan for a greater outcome… then practice it daily.
* Every successful action you take towards that plan starts to change your expectations.
So, where is the light at the end of the tunnel?
I think oftentimes we get lost in how much we are unhappy with our current situation, with no regard for what we actually want. If when we complain about our current situation, we can reframe it or at least combat the negative talk with positive action, replacing it with …AND THIS IS WHAT I WANT INSTEAD (not just a pep talk, but an actual detailed plan) maybe it will offer a vivid visualization and picture of what we want instead of just pounding into the universe all the stuff we don’t want or how much we hate our current situation.
One thing I know for sure is that there is only one way to get out from where we are now and get the energy flowing in a different direction, attracting things we want and the life we want… and that is to CHANGE SOMETHING and do something different. It doesn’t have to be drastic, sometimes it’s really the littlest things that have a biggest affect.
Lately, for me, it’s baby steps. It’s cleaning out little corners of my house, tossing what I don’t want and organizing what I do that is changing everything. I know I’ve been avoiding much of it for nearly two years now (since the divorce), and the process of actually doing it has been liberating. It’s so small, but each time I do it, I feel the energy swirling around after being stagnant for so long and suddenly things feel fresh and new and even I feel different. Each time I do it, new opportunities present themselves and it’s motivating me to do more. It’s like out with the old and in with the new, but on a vibrational/energetic level rather than acquiring more “things”, if that makes sense. And the little wins are so motivating I’m just looking around planning which area to get to next. There’s a lot. And they’re all attached to some sort of feeling/pain, which is obviously why I’ve been avoiding it. But now, there’s no stopping me and because of it, life is starting to feel a little magical again and I’m starting to really like it again 🙂
One little change -that you do every day- can change your life
Happy Monday Lovecats!
GO Live your Best Life… See it, Believe it, Take Action = Get it 🙂
* Find all my #MondayMotivation Posts here
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