What I’m Wearing…
* Vintage Levi’s with DIY Cut Out Heart Pockets
* Black and beige striped long sleeve tee
* Vintage Belt
* Double fishnets layered underneath
* Vintage oversized cardigan
* Wool hat
* Aquatalia ankle boots … seen here with one of my fave outfits as of late
* Stella McCartney sunglasses
* Title: Selena Gomez, Marshmello – Wolves… In your eyes, there’s a heavy blue… One to love and one to lose… Sweet divide, a heavy truth… OH, I wanna feel the way that we did that summer night… Drunk on a feeling, alone with the stars in the sky
I was on my walk yesterday and as I turned a corner, I saw a woman sitting with her dog at a bend up ahead. As I approached, she started to stand up and dust herself off, preparing to walk away. As I passed by, I smiled and said “HI” …and she was quick to explain why she had been sitting there… “There are just so few places you can see the lake from here” she said as her dog excitedly ran little circles around her. I replied, I know, isn’t it beautiful, PLEASE STAY, don’t let me bother you! …and I continued on my way.
I couldn’t stop thinking about it though; this woman was just enjoying a moment in nature, gazing at the blue lake in the distance, in a most peaceful state, and she was so worried about what I (a total stranger) was going to think about her that she got up and left. It may have been total coincidence, and she was ready to leave anyway, but her need to explain to me why she was there made me believe she left because of my presence (or anyone who may have walked by into her moment).
As a person who specifically goes on a walk/hike every day, not only for physical health, but for mental health as well, but mostly to connect with nature, I am the LAST person to judge another who might be doing the same.
But regardless, this woman didn’t know that about me, and didn’t know that I would have encouraged her to sit anywhere she liked in this forest to connect to it and find a moment of peace or beauty. In all honesty, it wouldn’t have mattered what I actually thought, it was her thought about what she thought I was going to think that made her decision for her.
And what I couldn’t stop thinking about is how we allow other people to dictate our lives based on our own fears of what they will think about us or how we perceive they will judge us.
It’s not really their actual judgement of us, it’s more so the worry we have about how or if they will judge us that makes us change our course.
I found myself wishing for moment that I had gone an alternate route just so I didn’t disturb her, but then I argued (with myself) that it was her choice to leave, not my forcing her to go.
Of course none of the actual events here were a big deal at all, but they did bring to my attention the little ways in which we give our power away, change our course, and make choices based on our own fears and worry about what others will think. I’m 100% positive, I’ve been in the exact same position the woman was in at some point in my life, in a place where I maybe thought I didn’t belong and left because I worried someone would judge me for it or I’d get into trouble for it, when really, I wasn’t doing anything wrong at all to get into trouble for. It’s a small act, but what does it say about how we value ourselves, I wonder, and how many things in life are we not taking the initiative on because we’re worried about what others think?
Imagine for a moment a life in which you did all the things you wanted to do without worrying about what anyone thought, without doubting yourself based on your fears of not being good enough and without talking yourself right out of doing the thing you love because of something someone else might say about it.
Remember that we are all just human and to let the fear of what others might think or say stop us from doing what we love or deter us from pursuing our life’s dream just falls back on ourselves. It’s like a grand excuse to not take a leap where we can easily trick ourselves into believing it’s everyone else’s fault.
But really, the blame falls on us.
So I ask you, and I ask myself: What do you want to do that you are not doing or procrastinating on doing because you’re afraid you’re not good enough or afraid of the judgment of others?
I can think of a few things, can you?
Maybe it’s time we take the leap, jump with abandon into a life we love without worrying for a second what anyone might think or say about it 🙂
Happy Thursday Lovecats!
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PS! I’m doing an Instagram Live tonight with Diane from Snapshot Fashion around 6pm PST if you want to join in!